210711 - Calm

So now is actually 11.33pm and I am blogging with the super heavy eyelid @.@

It was few days ago that I had my super unstable and low mood.

Just about these days, how I changed.

Basically, I was in a super duper crazy angry mood on the day the list revealed.

It's still that unfair and everything of my life out of sudden seems so tiny and the list eventually was the biggest part of my life.

Complaining to this and that, statuses and tweets with anger, I tried everything to release my feeling or it should be covering the truth of how failure am I?

I wonder actually why I felt of stress, so emotion, so disappoint and so upset to thing like this?

And I came out with some conclusions. I'll never lie here, believe me =P

Maybe just because of it's really unfair for us in blue, and I get annoyed?

Or perhaps, it does remind me about my past, about how failure was I that time too? Getting mini, tiny posses which in my dictionary is equally to failure and I do admit that I cant never stand for failure.

Or it's also because of I being left out alone again?

I do think so, all of the answer above are actually those which mixed up my feeling and brought me to the ending point.

A greatest appreciation to all those who did listen to my craps =P

I am still that immature.

I am still that impetuous, never think before I do.

I am still that emotion.

And I am childish.

Up to here, I never said that I regretted to post all the staff, to talk a lot of craps with friends. NO I never regret!

Just that I should really re-estimate who am I and how far I still can go with.

As in 18, I perhaps have to do like a 18.

Good luck to me!

Anyway, even I can partially off from the burden of the list event, I still stand on my side that there should be a fair competition among all and with no discriminate to anyone.

Ya I'm in blue, but I'll never regret being part of it.

And to those in my blacklist, all those problems maker, still the same, PLEASE get rid from me or else I'll really fight with you till the end!

放下一切，原来世界真的很美好 =)

但，唯一不放的，仍是对它的热诚，对自己的原则！