Cry

I cried. Cried not because of those scary words, not because of the one telling , not because of the them(those main character), but i do need a moment to relax, a moment of break.

No one saw me crying, even though i was in a open place. But someone did know it. Should i be glad coz no one saw my ugly crying face?

I felt scare. I felt alone. And i hate these feelings. Why am i always alone? Why cant anyone comfort me every moment when i need? Why cant you guys lend me yours shoulder as what i did to you all?

What he said. I did agree with it, but i dont realise it before. Why am i always the last to know the truth? Why cant you guys tell me everytime i made a mistake? I prefer you all tell me what i did wrong than you guys talk bad behind of me. I prefer you scold me than you dont border me.

***

In the group, i'm always the one being isolated. I'm always the one alone. You guys having your own world that i cant even step in. Not that i dont want to join you guys, but you guys dont let me in. Not that i want to make myself far apart with you all, but yours action made me afraid.

I dont want to be hurt again. I want to protect myself. Confronting you guys made me tired enough. I tolerate with you, but you didnt appreciate. So, i wont and i dont want to be the stupid one again.

***

Thank you for made me happy everytime. Thank you for what you guys did to me. I knew that you are worrying about me. Sorry for burden you all the time. Hopefully i can be more independent next time.

***

I will change my attitude as i promised.

[Another random post to me.]